TTSIA! :)
It's been that kind of a past few weeks:
EB has been making his way to my BIG POOP list: Stealing sugars (he's banned from them because he knows no self-control), using things that he knows he's not supposed to and then not even cleaning up, making dinner and then leaving everything a mess, saying he mowed the lawn when he didn't - just over the past 2 weeks, he's been insufferable. I think it's because MM & TSS have been gone working at one of the Boy Scout camps for the last 3 weeks - he's jealous that they get to be gone, he's irritated that he has to pick up the slack, he's bored because it's just him and TCC here - and he goes through cycles. Pity that he's doing this - he's just been invited by our TKD school to be a junior leader, test for a rank in weapons, participate in elite classes and join a swordsman class (a la SCA). If he doesn't get his stuff together, he's going to be out of most of those things. :P
Finances have been tight - which is always a stressful thing.
Hubby has been seriously lacking in his yard duties - we went out and spent almost $100 on plants and such for our front yard - and they only reason any of them are planted was because I told him when we were working on it. We bought a new trimmer, spent almost a grand on repairing both lawn mowers and a chain saw (one mower was a riding mower) - and I'm the only one who's done anything in the yard. Grass & weeds that I can't mow are all over the place and the trimmer is way beyond my 10# limitation. He won't take the time to look it over and teach EB how to use it - and EB is eager to do so!
Vehicles - had $400 in repairs to my van and an estimated $1200+ on Hubby's car, which is almost as much as it's worth. (Fortunately, we had another mechanic take a look and, yes, it will need to be done, but he managed to fix part of it and the rest he said it'll be a while.)
Roof - $300 repair
Both TCC and I have been going to therapy - him, occupational and physical; me, physical. So that's going to be probably another $500 each. And of course I've been lazy getting the flex spending stuff in...I wish I could just get my crap together...
Anyway, back to the title - just wanted to show you where I am, physically, mentally and emotionally. Tomorrow TCC and I are flying out to see his birthmom & her family. We get back late Wednesday night - I'm SO looking forward to being able to get away from everyone and everything here. Top it off with Hubby, MM, TSS and EB are all going to scout camp - they'll be there Sunday to next Saturday - so I'll still have some time away. Looking forward to some swimming, meeting new family and seeing a new city!
Enough gritching for now!
Life is a journey - enjoy the trip
Friday, June 14, 2013
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
It's hard to stay Zen...
...when you have pushy, selfish people in your life. :P
The family my last post talked about - the ones not liking change - are the only disgruntled people in the pack. Their son has been our highest seller for scout popcorn because his parents have pushed him hard every year to have that position. Last year, when he finally hit their goal for him, he asked if he had to sell anymore. To me, that speaks volumes - it should be fun, not a job.
Now that Hubby and I have taken some training on a new system of selling, we want every boy in our pack to have the opportunity to sell a lot. (We do some site sales - and they would take all sorts of times, leaving precious little to those who were new.) They're having a conniption fit because they don't want to try it and that it's being forced upon them. While I agree that it's being forced upon the pack, it's because that's the only way this new technique would reasonably be allowed by the very vocal opposition. (Very vocal opposition would be just be that family...)
Then I have EB who, because he had a consequence for not being ready to start our school day on time yesterday, threw out "I want to go to public school" again. He says this about half the time he's required to do something for school or after he's been at a scout function. I know he says it to try to get a reaction out of me. He kept saying it last night and I told him he needed to go away. (I was trying to make dinner on an already short schedule.) He finally asked, in a hopeful voice, "Are you getting upset?" "No, I'm tired of you saying you want to go to school when you don't get what you want." Last night, after scouts, he started up again...and MM started making fun of him when we got home because that's almost all EB talked about the whole way home. Would it be easier on me to get him out of the house so I can teach the willing participants? You BET! Do I think he'd get suspended within the first month or two? Absolutely. And am I going to be beholden to the school's schedule? No way.
Oh well...let the feelings wash over you, put them in a bubble and let them float away. :)
Have a great day!
The family my last post talked about - the ones not liking change - are the only disgruntled people in the pack. Their son has been our highest seller for scout popcorn because his parents have pushed him hard every year to have that position. Last year, when he finally hit their goal for him, he asked if he had to sell anymore. To me, that speaks volumes - it should be fun, not a job.
Now that Hubby and I have taken some training on a new system of selling, we want every boy in our pack to have the opportunity to sell a lot. (We do some site sales - and they would take all sorts of times, leaving precious little to those who were new.) They're having a conniption fit because they don't want to try it and that it's being forced upon them. While I agree that it's being forced upon the pack, it's because that's the only way this new technique would reasonably be allowed by the very vocal opposition. (Very vocal opposition would be just be that family...)
Then I have EB who, because he had a consequence for not being ready to start our school day on time yesterday, threw out "I want to go to public school" again. He says this about half the time he's required to do something for school or after he's been at a scout function. I know he says it to try to get a reaction out of me. He kept saying it last night and I told him he needed to go away. (I was trying to make dinner on an already short schedule.) He finally asked, in a hopeful voice, "Are you getting upset?" "No, I'm tired of you saying you want to go to school when you don't get what you want." Last night, after scouts, he started up again...and MM started making fun of him when we got home because that's almost all EB talked about the whole way home. Would it be easier on me to get him out of the house so I can teach the willing participants? You BET! Do I think he'd get suspended within the first month or two? Absolutely. And am I going to be beholden to the school's schedule? No way.
Oh well...let the feelings wash over you, put them in a bubble and let them float away. :)
Have a great day!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
A Cure
The past few days have been rather difficult for me to deal with. I don't enjoy stress - no, I take that back, I actually thrive on stress and work better under pressure. I don't enjoy being frustrated.
At any rate, between that and some medication I received, I have been having some problems sleeping and just being generally grumpy. However, last night I was able to sleep for almost a full 8 hours for the fist time in a really long time - and I took no sleep aids! How is that possible - because my "problems" are still around?
My hunch is these things had something to do with it:
The above I did last night before coming to bed - and I'm confident they resulted in a peaceful night's sleep. Letting go of the emotions that are attached to your problems, while challenging (and, obviously, I haven't quite done that with all of them) is refreshing and uplifting - takes the weight off of your shoulders.
As I find myself back in more normal and relaxed state, I bid you a peaceful day.
We have had an issue with resistance to change with our scout pack - those the most resistant actually being people who have no children involved.
Also in the pack, I have been struggling with one parent's habit of deriding the decisions of other parents and families. I found it put me in a difficult place because I know the behaviors of this parent's children were one of the many reasons we decided to homeschool. With that knowledge, it's hard for me to accept their offhanded judgments.
We've also had some annoyances with EB and TCC's grandmother. She has a history of being untruthful and unreliable. I've had some contact with her and was pulled in by, what I would call, her manipulative ways. I've struggled with how to make her respond - though I know I can't force anyone to do anything - especially if they don't really want to.
My hunch is these things had something to do with it:
Hubby spoke to a higher up in scouts. Just him voicing that concern is a big step.
I wrote a blog entry for the second one and then let it sit overnight.That evolved into today's post - which is much shorter and far more positive.
I sent a message to the grandmother, telling her in a polite (and not so direct) manner that our family, and the boys in particular, aren't going to sit around waiting for her to follow through. There needs to be some effort on her part, more than just words - or there won't be any more contact. (Ok, that last part was my own quiet mental fortitude peaking through. However, should I not hear from her by the end of the month, will be the end result.)
The boys know about the attempts to deal with her and, truth be told, have only once or twice asked about it. (This has been going on since July) They aren't counting on her. I need to let go too.
The above I did last night before coming to bed - and I'm confident they resulted in a peaceful night's sleep. Letting go of the emotions that are attached to your problems, while challenging (and, obviously, I haven't quite done that with all of them) is refreshing and uplifting - takes the weight off of your shoulders.
As I find myself back in more normal and relaxed state, I bid you a peaceful day.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Rain!
We had rain last night! First time in a long time we've had any moisture. Unfortunately it didn't rain enough to lower the temps; merely enough to raise the humidity and offer a slight reprieve to the plants.
I was excited when I saw the temps were going to be in the low 90s over the next few days. then I looked at the projected forecast – over 100 again starting next week.
Not much to do about it though, just make the best of it.
Peace
I was excited when I saw the temps were going to be in the low 90s over the next few days. then I looked at the projected forecast – over 100 again starting next week.
Not much to do about it though, just make the best of it.
Peace
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Changes on the horizon
Well, the crappy economy has finally hit my work. Received a message from my boss saying our fall enrollment was the lowest it's been since our school opened 7 years ago and they're just trying to get by. Fortunately I always knew my position was a luxury - even though I was only there for about 3 hours a week.
For me, it was extra money - out to eat, special treats, extra classes, etc. For my boss - she's the primary breadwinner in her family. My heart goes out to her, her family and the other employees who might be affected more drastically than I. For several, it's their sole income.
This will affect our upcoming school year - I was contemplating subscribing to Discovery streamingPlus (or their science program), sending the kids to a couple of different classes at the zoo and/or the Homeschool Learning Center - but that, too, is a luxury. I can handle the $5 classes at the art and history museum - and MM will still go to the art museum for his art classes and EB will continue to go to the medieval classes he takes at our taekwondo school.
So...time to be a little more frugal - thank goodness for libraries and free online educational tools. I started investigating Khan Academy and think we'll be utilizing that this year. I also have started checking out Sophia.org, which is headed up by Bill Nye - yes, the Science Guy!
Scouts
MM is currently working as a Counselor In Training at the local Boy Scout camp. He had a great time the first week (he's only working 2 weeks - just became eligible) working with the equestrian program. He was hoping to work there again this past week. He comes home on Saturday. It's been strange not having him around, but his level of confidence soared in just the one week - I'm looking forward to seeing what he'll come back with after his second week. (Which had feels-like temps of over 100 every day!)
TCC went to his first overnight scout camp with Hubby last weekend and had a great time! This weekend, he's joining Hubby and EB for a weekend camping with the troop. (EB is hoping for some swimming, fishing, canoing or kayaking, but given the level of the river, there might be nothing but sand...)
Personal Changes
I've been doing some personal growth lately. I've deactivated the dreaded FB account (complete with changing the password and deleting the apps...) - there were only a handful of people I actually wanted to see updates from. (Yes, my only follower, you're one of them!) Eventually I'll go back, but I have no strong desire to do so right now.
I've been working on becoming more active again - kind of fell off the wagon for a while, but have gone back to taekwondo after a month off, started swimming and am walking most days while the boys are in their taekwondo classes. I'm eating much better than I had been (of course, vacation tends to blow any chance at quality diet - especially when your destination doesn't have much more than deep-fried foods...).
On a related note, TCC and I tested for our new taekwondo ranks before vacation. We thought we flubbed big-time - but he went back about 2 weeks later and I went back 4 weeks later - we both passed on the first go-round! He's hoping to make yellow belt before his birthday - which is definitely doable. My goal of getting my green belt before Christmas is well within sight, since it's my next rank!
I've been making foods ahead of time - breakfast foods and breads are in the freezer currently, along with a round of leftover spaghetti. Next up I think will be some dinners - we've been going out too much because we've been unprepared and it's cutting into the budget!
I've been keeping up fairly well with the kitchen, which is astounding! I've been working on getting the boys to get chores done too - I'd like to get us in to a routine on cleaning - if everyone pitches in on a room a day, the house should at least be decent and we should still have plenty of time for school when we start up again early next month.
Still working on calm parenting and calm living. Striving for a Zen-like approach - doesn't always happen, but it's surely a learning process. Living in the here and now - not in the past "what's done" and not in the future "what-ifs".
And, I cut my hair! It's been shoulder-length (give or take) for quite a while and I realized my swimming ability was suffering. (Crawl with hair in your mouth? Yuck!) Plus, it's so much easier to work with. My SIL, who is my normal stylist, wasn't available when I decided "it's got to go", so I went somewhere else. It's still a little too long, so I'm going to see my SIL tomorrow to get it fixed. But, I really, really like it!
Alright - time to think about bed.
Peace!
(P.S. I picked up an iPad 2 back a few months ago, mostly for schooling - I'll post about some apps later.)
For me, it was extra money - out to eat, special treats, extra classes, etc. For my boss - she's the primary breadwinner in her family. My heart goes out to her, her family and the other employees who might be affected more drastically than I. For several, it's their sole income.
This will affect our upcoming school year - I was contemplating subscribing to Discovery streamingPlus (or their science program), sending the kids to a couple of different classes at the zoo and/or the Homeschool Learning Center - but that, too, is a luxury. I can handle the $5 classes at the art and history museum - and MM will still go to the art museum for his art classes and EB will continue to go to the medieval classes he takes at our taekwondo school.
So...time to be a little more frugal - thank goodness for libraries and free online educational tools. I started investigating Khan Academy and think we'll be utilizing that this year. I also have started checking out Sophia.org, which is headed up by Bill Nye - yes, the Science Guy!
Scouts
MM is currently working as a Counselor In Training at the local Boy Scout camp. He had a great time the first week (he's only working 2 weeks - just became eligible) working with the equestrian program. He was hoping to work there again this past week. He comes home on Saturday. It's been strange not having him around, but his level of confidence soared in just the one week - I'm looking forward to seeing what he'll come back with after his second week. (Which had feels-like temps of over 100 every day!)
TCC went to his first overnight scout camp with Hubby last weekend and had a great time! This weekend, he's joining Hubby and EB for a weekend camping with the troop. (EB is hoping for some swimming, fishing, canoing or kayaking, but given the level of the river, there might be nothing but sand...)
Personal Changes
I've been doing some personal growth lately. I've deactivated the dreaded FB account (complete with changing the password and deleting the apps...) - there were only a handful of people I actually wanted to see updates from. (Yes, my only follower, you're one of them!) Eventually I'll go back, but I have no strong desire to do so right now.
I've been working on becoming more active again - kind of fell off the wagon for a while, but have gone back to taekwondo after a month off, started swimming and am walking most days while the boys are in their taekwondo classes. I'm eating much better than I had been (of course, vacation tends to blow any chance at quality diet - especially when your destination doesn't have much more than deep-fried foods...).
On a related note, TCC and I tested for our new taekwondo ranks before vacation. We thought we flubbed big-time - but he went back about 2 weeks later and I went back 4 weeks later - we both passed on the first go-round! He's hoping to make yellow belt before his birthday - which is definitely doable. My goal of getting my green belt before Christmas is well within sight, since it's my next rank!
I've been making foods ahead of time - breakfast foods and breads are in the freezer currently, along with a round of leftover spaghetti. Next up I think will be some dinners - we've been going out too much because we've been unprepared and it's cutting into the budget!
I've been keeping up fairly well with the kitchen, which is astounding! I've been working on getting the boys to get chores done too - I'd like to get us in to a routine on cleaning - if everyone pitches in on a room a day, the house should at least be decent and we should still have plenty of time for school when we start up again early next month.
Still working on calm parenting and calm living. Striving for a Zen-like approach - doesn't always happen, but it's surely a learning process. Living in the here and now - not in the past "what's done" and not in the future "what-ifs".
And, I cut my hair! It's been shoulder-length (give or take) for quite a while and I realized my swimming ability was suffering. (Crawl with hair in your mouth? Yuck!) Plus, it's so much easier to work with. My SIL, who is my normal stylist, wasn't available when I decided "it's got to go", so I went somewhere else. It's still a little too long, so I'm going to see my SIL tomorrow to get it fixed. But, I really, really like it!
Alright - time to think about bed.
Peace!
(P.S. I picked up an iPad 2 back a few months ago, mostly for schooling - I'll post about some apps later.)
Friday, June 8, 2012
Quick update
So, our last few weeks of school haven't been anything. I haven't been wanting to do anything except vegetate... The house is still a disaster, but at least some of the yard work is getting done and the laundry was caught up for a while.
Today I have a list of things that need to be done to clean up the house and the boys and I will work on them over the next 2 days. That'll put my mind at ease and I'm sure I'll be able to function better. (Pigsty house=shut down brain & motivation for me)
Time to run - been working on other things in the midst of the blogging and completely forgot what exactly I was going to be posting. But, children are up and about, showers are going, breakfast is being consumed and we'll be starting on housecleaning and laundry soon.
Have a fabulous weekend!
Today I have a list of things that need to be done to clean up the house and the boys and I will work on them over the next 2 days. That'll put my mind at ease and I'm sure I'll be able to function better. (Pigsty house=shut down brain & motivation for me)
Time to run - been working on other things in the midst of the blogging and completely forgot what exactly I was going to be posting. But, children are up and about, showers are going, breakfast is being consumed and we'll be starting on housecleaning and laundry soon.
Have a fabulous weekend!
Monday, May 21, 2012
Sleep, it doth elude me
It's almost 3am - and here I am on the computer. Really?
I have a lot of things rushing around in my brain, apparently:
I broke a tooth Friday, so I'm anxiously awaiting my dentist's call first thing in the morning to see if I can get in to get a crown. At least it shouldn't be a root canal! Had one of those last year - apparently on the wrong tooth. I don't blame the dentist - my "mystery tooth" has been bothering me off and on for over 10 years. We've fooled around trying to figure out which one is the right one and last summer I was positive that we had it - got a crown, then a root canal because the crown didn't solve it. Once that one was on, within a week, I knew it wasn't right - but the darn thing just wouldn't show itself. The dentist said from the get-go that he thought it was a hairline crack and that eventually it'd show up or break off. It did - and it's not even one of the teeth I thought it could have been! Darn mixed up wiring in the mouth...
I'm trying to get the kids on a school schedule again - but we have so much other stuff to accomplish, it's not working. The story of my life... So, today they're working on math and typing, then we'll do some stuff on one of the older boys' merit badges, do some cleaning up (the house is a disaster), a bit of yard work, and then swimming. My goal is to finish up one merit badge this week, another next week, a third one the following week, then work on our current unit study and fit in swimming several times each week. EB needs to be a confident and capable swimmer before mid-June (Hubby is also taking him swimming about 6am most mornings.) and MM and TSS need to regain some comfort and stamina by then too.
As I said above, the house is a disaster; the yard is atrocious and a mess; laundry is backed up - just a lot of things that distract me and pretty much shut down my motivation centers.
While not a problem, it's something that's been in my head - Saturday TSS, EB, TCC and I all competed in a martial arts tournament. Our school had 8 of us representing - not too bad, considering we're not an enormous school. Even our master instructor was there and competing. TSS did forms and won 3rd place for his age and rank; EB sparred and did ok - didn't move much at all; TCC was put in the wrong category, but gave it his all and will receive a medal from the school; I won 3rd place in forms for my age bracket (against men) and 1st place for women's sparring. (I was the only one in my age bracket and rank to spar so was guaranteed a first place win, but I fought two women at least half my age - and won - to earn it.) Next month I'm hoping to test for my next rank.
Also working on building up my stamina for bike riding. I'd like to build up so I can ride my bike to work - probably not much more than a mile, but at this point, I can't do that. I credit all of my increased fitness and activity to my chiropractor (and my final decision to go see her). With 6 weeks worth of treatment, I went from almost immobile to riding a bike, entering a TKD tourney, walking, stretching and swimming again. HUZZAH!
I'm working my normal work schedule over the summer. First time I've worked over the summer since my first year there. I'm actually looking forward to it. :)
Last pick up of a friend's son from public school today - at least for this school year. They asked if I would pick him up next year as well, so I already know to include that in our schedule. I expect next year will be my last year as his brother should be driving by the end of December.
Ok, time to see if dumping my brain will let me get back to sleep.
I have a lot of things rushing around in my brain, apparently:
I broke a tooth Friday, so I'm anxiously awaiting my dentist's call first thing in the morning to see if I can get in to get a crown. At least it shouldn't be a root canal! Had one of those last year - apparently on the wrong tooth. I don't blame the dentist - my "mystery tooth" has been bothering me off and on for over 10 years. We've fooled around trying to figure out which one is the right one and last summer I was positive that we had it - got a crown, then a root canal because the crown didn't solve it. Once that one was on, within a week, I knew it wasn't right - but the darn thing just wouldn't show itself. The dentist said from the get-go that he thought it was a hairline crack and that eventually it'd show up or break off. It did - and it's not even one of the teeth I thought it could have been! Darn mixed up wiring in the mouth...
I'm trying to get the kids on a school schedule again - but we have so much other stuff to accomplish, it's not working. The story of my life... So, today they're working on math and typing, then we'll do some stuff on one of the older boys' merit badges, do some cleaning up (the house is a disaster), a bit of yard work, and then swimming. My goal is to finish up one merit badge this week, another next week, a third one the following week, then work on our current unit study and fit in swimming several times each week. EB needs to be a confident and capable swimmer before mid-June (Hubby is also taking him swimming about 6am most mornings.) and MM and TSS need to regain some comfort and stamina by then too.
As I said above, the house is a disaster; the yard is atrocious and a mess; laundry is backed up - just a lot of things that distract me and pretty much shut down my motivation centers.
While not a problem, it's something that's been in my head - Saturday TSS, EB, TCC and I all competed in a martial arts tournament. Our school had 8 of us representing - not too bad, considering we're not an enormous school. Even our master instructor was there and competing. TSS did forms and won 3rd place for his age and rank; EB sparred and did ok - didn't move much at all; TCC was put in the wrong category, but gave it his all and will receive a medal from the school; I won 3rd place in forms for my age bracket (against men) and 1st place for women's sparring. (I was the only one in my age bracket and rank to spar so was guaranteed a first place win, but I fought two women at least half my age - and won - to earn it.) Next month I'm hoping to test for my next rank.
Also working on building up my stamina for bike riding. I'd like to build up so I can ride my bike to work - probably not much more than a mile, but at this point, I can't do that. I credit all of my increased fitness and activity to my chiropractor (and my final decision to go see her). With 6 weeks worth of treatment, I went from almost immobile to riding a bike, entering a TKD tourney, walking, stretching and swimming again. HUZZAH!
I'm working my normal work schedule over the summer. First time I've worked over the summer since my first year there. I'm actually looking forward to it. :)
Last pick up of a friend's son from public school today - at least for this school year. They asked if I would pick him up next year as well, so I already know to include that in our schedule. I expect next year will be my last year as his brother should be driving by the end of December.
Ok, time to see if dumping my brain will let me get back to sleep.
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